Our Very Existence

Random. And incoherent.

Naruto is the key to maturity.

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Today was an extremely ordinary day. Everything went as ordinarily as expected. I also expected the completely BS parts, like going to this one class and spending time getting annoyed by my idiot of a classmate.

Me and my classmates were all standing outside the classroom as our professor was incredibly late. So late, in fact, that when she arrived, we had one hour left out of the two and a half hours allocated for the lab period.

We were all doing our own thing while waiting. My friends were busy laying out for some magazine, others were busy playing Temple Run 2, and some were just…staring blankly into space. As always, what stood out in our class was this one guy who doesn’t deserve to exist.

I have this habit of listening to public conversations even with earphones on. As I was listening to music in a decent volume, I was also listening to Mr. Amazing Guy talking in a loud voice.

Here’s an analogy to put his loudness in perspective: His peers were to a truck’s diesel engine while Amazing Guy’s was to a jet engine revving up before sprinting to take off.

It was that loud. It was as if he wanted everyone to hear every word he’s saying because everything he says is right.

They were talking about random anime when all of a sudden…

"I only watch Naruto because I am a mature man."

HOLY SHIT HE FOUND THE HOLY GRAIL TO MATURITY! His sentence might be grammatically incorrect but…who cares?! He’s mature for fucks sake!

From this logic, it is safe to assume that:

  • Everyone who watches Naruto EXCLUSIVELY is a mature person. If you watch any other anime other than Naruto (even with Naruto), you are not mature.

Also, from what I have noticed from his mature personality, you must also do the following:

  • Buy a Nexus 7 and bring the box to class to show to your classmates.
  • Buy big-ass headphones, BUT DON’T USE IT. Wrap it around your neck and allow your device to play through its speakers. For maximum effect, watch DJMax videos on YouTube, put the volume on max, and tap the screen as if you were playing. This is to prove that you are amazing at this game, therefore, mature.
  • Correct your peers in the most disrespectful of ways. While two people are talking, walk in and directly say whatever it is in your mature mind regardless of correctness (see: why computer science was never my first choice)
  • Ask your teacher how the word "offset" is spelled.
  • Feel superior.

There you have it folks. Go grab your copy of the past 600 episodes of Naruto now!!!!!

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Written by kpbotbot

January 25, 2013 at 12:53 pm

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